these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
