i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
