Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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