yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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