please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
