I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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