i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
