Little spoons don't ask big questions
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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