My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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