im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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