It's like God shit irony all over that family
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
