he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
