Don't you send me to vm
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize