well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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