well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
