3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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