I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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