Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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