Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
