You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
