party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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