her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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