Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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