its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
