Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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