My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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