Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
