New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
All I want is dick and wine.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
