I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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