i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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