READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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