just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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