Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
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