Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
