There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
