Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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