i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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