i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
