This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
