she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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