You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I deserve this hangover.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
