well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
