It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
