You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
