JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
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