This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
two words...techno handjob
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
