so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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