Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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