it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
