You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
so explain again why im purple
no
so that wasnt chicken after all
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Randomize
