Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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